"Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers." - VoltairE

Showing category "Random stuff" (Show all posts)

Thank You for Saying No

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, September 6, 2023, In : Random stuff 


I recently came across this poem by Ruth Harms Calkin and thought it was really profound.

Thank You for Saying No

Lord, day after day I've thanked You
For saying yes.

But when have I genuinely thanked You
For saying no?

Yet I shudder to think
Of the possible smears
The cumulative blots on my life
Had You not been sufficiently wise
To say an unalterable no.

So thank You for saying no
When my want list for things
Far exceeded my longing for You.
When I asked for a stone
Foolishly certain I asked for bread
Than...

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Cryptic Bible places quiz

Posted by Anne Witton on Thursday, August 10, 2023, In : Random stuff 


It’s time for another slightly less serious blog post, so here are some cryptic clues to biblical place names. Enjoy!

  1. Ms Hathoway, hot drink, Scottish exclamation
  2. Back yard of Cornish project
  3. Cartoon Tom’s companion with runner Sebastian’s surname
  4. Occular portent
  5. An infant meets the first part of the capital
  6. Gymnast Tweddle, Comedian Mr. Mack, edge of a dress
  7. Thank you kebab!
  8. Water in Amman’s country
  9. Go wandering
  10. Country of affirmative head gesture
  11. A clump of earth and a meditative noise
  12. Remains ...

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Bench

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, May 3, 2023, In : Random stuff 


Just for fun, here's a poem I wrote three years ago when my friends gave me random words and challenged me to base some verse on them. So here's 'bench':

Every year we come back here -
look out to sea.
Private memories, shared silence.
He loved it here,
did William.
Who did he think about
when he sat and mused?
What intricacies entwined themselves
in heart and mind?
What puzzles did he turn over
until they were smoothed?
Or maybe we’ve afforded him
an intellectual dignity
that never was.
Maybe he was thin...

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Grandpa's gadgets

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, March 9, 2021, In : Random stuff 


My Grandpa’s a sucker for a gadget. He’s bought all sorts of things over the years from idiot-proof cameras to slow cookers. He would excitedly unpack his new purchase, have a cursory go with it and then declare it stupid because he couldn’t get it to work and so he’d never use it again. (Sometimes he had a point. We all had a chuckle when an ‘anti-red eye pen’ turned out to be basically a black biro that you scribbled on your photos with.)

But most of the time it was more of a cas...

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Check your sources

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, November 3, 2020, In : Random stuff 


One of the unfortunate effects of the COVID-19 crisis seems to be an increase in false information being shared via social media and messaging apps. I’ve had supermarket scams, fake C. S. Lewis quotes and vaccination rumours shared with me by well-meaning fellow Christians (sometimes multiple times).

There are also Christian memes doing the rounds - sentiments that are wrapped up to look like Bible verses but are not in fact biblical. You may have seen the kind of thing – a cute puppy with...

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The way she tells 'em

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, July 15, 2020, In : Random stuff 
Back in May, I had one day (31st May to be precise) where I suddenly decided to write some poems. I ended up writing 15 on a range of themes. Here's one of them that I hope you'll enjoy.



The way she tells 'em

A funny thing happened
the other day.
Now was it Tuesday or Wednesday?
I think it was Wednesday because
it was the day my new secateurs 
arrived through the post.
No wait! It was Tuesday 
when Sheila rang with the news
that her cat had had kittens
and her daughter had mumps.
Anyway, it was raining.
N...

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Cryptic names and descriptions of God quiz

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, June 30, 2020, In : Random stuff 


1. Postman who does weights
2. Opposite of Cyclops
3. Posh yes, discover the mass
4. I am a Spanish waiter
5. Swedish supergroup
6. Hi third person singular
7. Monarch’s son of green vegetables
8. 1990s chat show
9. Eating flames
10. Like Greyfriars Bobby perhaps?
11. At the very top
12. Very old, periods of time
13. Unfit sock of Jerusalem’s land
14. Souvenir from Blackpool?
15. Winner of ‘One man and his dog’
16. Lots of money for finding a lost pet
17. An inhabitant of Stoke on Trent’s professio...

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What I learned about prayer from my friend and her lucky crystal

Posted by Anne Witton on Monday, April 20, 2020, In : Random stuff 


I’ve just read ‘Faitheism’ by Krish Kandiah and found it really helpful and thought-provoking. He seeks to diffuse the ‘us vs them’ polarisation that often characterises interactions between Atheists and Christians and explores ways that we can find common ground and forge more meaningful relationships.

In the chapter on suffering he highlights a couple of case studies where Christians have been disciplined or fired from their jobs because they’ve offered to pray with people at wor...

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Coronavirus - opportunities for mission

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, March 18, 2020, In : Random stuff 


In these uncertain times, many people are understandably feeling a mixture of emotions including fear and anger. For many, the things that they find security in like health, work, finances and comfortable living are being taken away. It's easy to panic. It's easy to react by hoarding tins of meatballs and packets of loo roll. But how do we as God's people respond? Here are 3 very simple things that I have found helpful:

  1. Remembering that God is still sovereign. This is not a surprise to God. Th...

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A few faith-based funnies

Posted by Anne Witton on Thursday, June 13, 2019, In : Random stuff 


A minister decided to visit his church members one Saturday. At one particular house it was clear that someone was home, but nobody came to the door. The minister knocked several times and finally took out his card and wrote on the back: 

Revelation 3:20 - "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and dine with him and he with me." 

The next day the same card showed up in the collection plate. Below the minister’s message was another s...

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9 inspirational women from the New Testament

Posted by Anne Witton on Thursday, June 6, 2019, In : Random stuff 
I love the fact that the New Testament records a range of women of different ages and backgrounds using their skills and gifts for God's Kingdom. We see rich and poor, educated and uneducated, single and married, leaders, charity workers, intellectuals, risk-takers, business women and craftswomen all being used by God in powerful ways. It truly is astonishing when you think about the cultural context of the New Testament - in the Jewish world, Greek culture and the Roman empire - that women h...
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9 Christian women you should know

Posted by Anne Witton on Friday, May 17, 2019, In : Random stuff 
  1. Susan B. Anthony (1820 - 1906)
    Born into a Quaker family with a long history of anti-slave activism, Susan B. Anthony developed an early sense of fairness and justice. She dedicated her life to women’s suffrage after joining the women’s rights movements in 1852. She campaigned for the abolition of slavery, the right for women to own their own property, to keep their earnings, as well as their right to attend higher learning institutions.


  2. Sojourner Truth (Unknown - 1883)
    She was born a sla...

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11 more of my favourite podcasts

Posted by Anne Witton on Friday, March 8, 2019, In : Random stuff 


Welcome to the latest post in my occasional podcast recommendation series.

You can catch up on my previous recommendations here:
I've got a mixed topic bag of 11 of my current favourites. See what you think and let me know in the comments below if there are any you'd add:

Topic: Christian Q and A
Frequency: Fortnightly
Running time: 30 mins (usually)
New Testament theologian and prol...

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Tips for debating better on Facebook - Guest post

Posted by Anne Witton on Thursday, October 18, 2018, In : Random stuff 


One of my friends recently shared some really helpful advice about engaging in Facebook debate. I can’t share his name as he’s a missionary in a sensitive context, but he’s given me permission to use his material here.

“There are people with whom I disagree but whose posts I always read carefully and appreciate. There are people with whom I agree where I cringe when reading posts. (All of these are people I like, agreeing or disagreeing doesn't change that.)

Most arguments on Facebook a...

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What’s your favourite smell?

Posted by Anne Witton on Monday, June 25, 2018, In : Random stuff 


I've been thinking a lot recently about smells and more specifically about the power of smell to recall long-forgotten people and places from the distant past. We've probably all had the experience when we've been going about our daily lives when suddenly a scent will stop us in our tracks and we feel that we are once again in our grandmother's kitchen or walking through the school doors for the very first time. Smell can transport you back to the moment in a way that no other sense can and c...

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Dramatic rescue

Posted by Anne Witton on Saturday, May 26, 2018, In : Random stuff 



Abby and I had a lovely week in the Scottish Borders at the start of May, but it didn’t turn out quite as restful as expected, with me having to be airlifted to safety off a cliff! We’d walked along a coastal path to Siccar Point which has some fascinating geological formations. Abby wisely decided to stay up top, but I saw a rope by the fence so lowered myself down for a closer look. After exploring the rocks, I decided to try coming back up the steep slope an ‘easier’ way so I scram...


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10 Christian podcasts to grow your faith

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, February 7, 2018, In : Random stuff 


This is the third post in my series on recommended podcasts and there are some absolute gems to discover.

(1) Nomad 
Topic: Interviews with Christian thinkers
Frequency: Fortnightly
Run time: Variable. Usually about 90 mins.
This is my current favourite and I listen to it while I’m swimming (on a waterproof MP3 player). Tim and David present a fascinating showcase of thoughtful viewpoints. Topics range from ecology, uncertainty and consumerism to LGBT identity, the arts, and mission-shap...


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The Monk and the Woman

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, January 24, 2018, In : Random stuff 


Two Buddhist monks, on their way to the monastery, found an exceedingly beautiful woman at the river bank. Like them, she wanted to cross the river, but the water was too high. So one of them took her across on his shoulders.

The other was thoroughly scandalised. For two hours he scolded the offender for his breach of the Rule: Had he forgotten he was a monk? How had he dared to touch the woman? And worse, carry her over the river? And what would people say? Had he not disgraced their holy Rel...

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Cryptic Christmas Carols and Songs

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, December 5, 2017, In : Random stuff 


Here's a bit of seasonal fun for you - 15 cryptic clues to popular Christmas songs. Enjoy!

  1. Ms Vorderman in Brighton
  2. Snooker's Mr. Junhui and Vietnam's currency happily elevated
  3. Ms. Valance and the evergreen climber
  4. Advertising song, Taco _____ , Blackpool treat
  5. Petite male timpanist
  6. Deep satisfaction to the earth
  7. One spied a trio of vessels
  8. Quiet after sunset
  9. Small, mafia boss, door opener
  10. Toboggan trip
  11. Folk story of the Big Apple
  12. The Almighty, pause, you inebriated chaps
  13. Triplicate monarchs
  14. On the desolat...

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10 more great podcasts

Posted by Anne Witton on Thursday, November 9, 2017, In : Random stuff 


In a previous post, I shared 12 of my favourite podcasts. I know that many of you enjoyed discovering them and so I thought I’d share 10 more podcasts that are enjoyable and informative.

As before, all of these are available free through iTunes, Google Play, Spotify, Stitcher and other Podcast services.

Topic: Theology
Frequency: Weekly
Running time: 40 - 60 mins
From the makers of the excellent Bible Project videos, this podcast comprises dialogue between hosts Tim and Jon...

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11 Christian musicians who are worth a listen

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, August 9, 2017, In : Random stuff 


I always like getting recommendations of new artists to check out, so I hope you’ll enjoy discovering some new favourites here. In no particular order:

  1. Jane Kitson
    North-East based Jane Kitson is a talented singer-songwriter, pianist, guitarist (and probably plays other instruments as well), with a great voice.

  2. Aaron Taylor
    Soulful Aaron Taylor is so mellow and his R&B sounds are silky smooth.

  3. mStork
    mStork is ‘not your average rap package, unabashedly expansive and genuinely rebellious'. His l...

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Cryptic Christians Quiz

Posted by Anne Witton on Monday, July 24, 2017, In : Random stuff 


Every now and again I like to post something a bit lighthearted on my blog, and this time I've written a series of cryptic clues to lead you to the names of famous Christians past and present. See if you can get them all without looking stuff up on Google!

  1. Redeemed, eighth month, adolescent 
  2. Dad's Army's Mr Dunn, paper-fasteners, Oxford crime-solver
  3. Mr Major has a bony foot deformity
  4. Fairy take goat, Golden cereal
  5. Ultimate, toilet, vehicle, uncooked-bread
  6. Triple-jumping puritan theologian?
  7. Mr Presco...

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Educational, inspirational and funny treats for your ears: 12 of my favourite podcasts

Posted by Anne Witton on Friday, May 26, 2017, In : Random stuff 


I find that listening to podcasts helps me to engage with big ideas, be more informed about the world around me, and enjoy some top-class entertainment. Maybe you haven’t tried podcasts yet, or maybe you’re looking for some new favourites. There are thousands of brilliant free podcasts out there just waiting to be discovered, but where do you start? Well, hopefully this list of my 12 favourites will point you in the right direction.

All of these are available free through iTunes, Google Pl...

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Legal drug

Posted by Anne Witton on Saturday, April 29, 2017, In : Random stuff 


I've been doing a lot of thinking and reading recently about how technology affects our emotional and spiritual lives. Once I've formulated my thoughts, I'm sure I'll write something about it here.

In the meantime, I discovered a load of old poetry when I was sorting through some folders on my computer. This is a poem that I wrote when I was 17 in 1994, before most people had the internet and long before social media and smartphones. It's interesting to re-discover it and realise that I seem t...
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40th birthday reflections

Posted by Anne Witton on Friday, November 25, 2016, In : Random stuff 
Last week was a significant week for me as I marked my 40th birthday! It was great to be surrounded by family and friends and also to reflect on how far God has brought me. I am reminded of John 10: 10 when Jesus says "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." I haven't always been able to grasp that, but as I celebrated with so many people that I treasure all around me and thought about the hope I have in Christ, I feel immensely grateful to him for everything he's given...
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The Wind and the Sun

Posted by Anne Witton on Thursday, August 4, 2016, In : Random stuff 


As a child, my favourite book was a collection of Aesop's fables. I loved the tales of animals and people facing moral dilemmas, and the important lessons I could learn from them.

As I've been thinking about how to communicate my faith in a postmodern world, a particular story came to mind, so I thought I'd share it here.

The Wind and the Sun

The wind and the sun were once arguing about which of them was the stronger. As they could not agree, they decided to arrange a contest.

"You see that trave...
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Sheep Thief

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, July 5, 2016, In : Random stuff 



At primary school, we often used to have stories in assembly and there is one in particular that has stuck with me. It was a tale of two brothers in a rural community who once stole some sheep. They were caught and their punishment was to have the letters ‘ST’ for ‘Sheep Thief’ branded onto their foreheads so that everyone would know of their crime and the kind of people they were.

One of the brothers was so ashamed that he ran away to far off lands. Wherever he went, people were susp...


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If students wrote the Bible

Posted by Anne Witton on Monday, October 5, 2015, In : Random stuff 


  • Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.
  • The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning, cold.
  • The forbidden fruit would still have been eaten because anything is better than the food in halls.
  • Paul's letter to the Romans becomes Paul's e-mail to believers@romans.gov
  • Reason Cain killed Abel: they were living in the one bedsit and the dishes weren't getting done.
  • The t...

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Biblical Top Trumps

Posted by Anne Witton on Wednesday, August 5, 2015, In : Random stuff 


Whilst sorting through files on my computer, I came across a home-made set of Top Trumps based on Biblical characters that I devised about 12 years ago. The rules of the game are quite simple and are as follows:

Object: To win all the cards

Preparation: Deal the cards out so that each person has the same number. Pour yourself a drink and put some Twigletts in a bowl (optional)

Play: Each player holds their pack and only looks at the top card. Choose who starts first (an arm-wrestle is usually a ...

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Princess Anne visits Gateshead Foodbank

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, March 24, 2015, In : Random stuff 


Yesterday I had the privilege of meeting royalty as Princess Anne visited the Foodbank where I volunteer. The Princess spent a good amount of time chatting with us and finding out about how the Foodbank works.

There was lots of press coverage of the event. We had a great write up in the Chronicle which included a little interview with me, and I was also interviewed for BBC Look North.

It was a lovely occasion and will hopefully raise the profile of the Foodbank so that more people will support ...
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Where do you weigh a pie?

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, December 9, 2014, In : Random stuff 
...Somewhere over the rainbow!

I love a good cracker joke and have been collecting up favourites to share with you. Enjoy!



Q. Why did no-one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay?
A. Because they were two deer.

Q. How do you know if Santa's been in your garden shed?
A. You've got three extra hoes.

Q. What's the most popular Christmas wine?
A. 'I don't like Brussels sprouts!'

Q. What operating system do Advent calendars use?
A. Windows 24

Q. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A. Fsh!

Q. Why are horse-dra...

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