"Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers." - VoltairE

Showing Tag: "humour" (Show all posts)

A few faith-based funnies

Posted by Anne Witton on Thursday, June 13, 2019, In : Random stuff 


A minister decided to visit his church members one Saturday. At one particular house it was clear that someone was home, but nobody came to the door. The minister knocked several times and finally took out his card and wrote on the back: 

Revelation 3:20 - "Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and dine with him and he with me." 

The next day the same card showed up in the collection plate. Below the minister’s message was another s...

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If students wrote the Bible

Posted by Anne Witton on Monday, October 5, 2015, In : Random stuff 


  • Instead of God creating the world in six days and resting on the seventh, he would have put it off until the night before it was due and then pulled an all-nighter.
  • The Last Supper would have been eaten the next morning, cold.
  • The forbidden fruit would still have been eaten because anything is better than the food in halls.
  • Paul's letter to the Romans becomes Paul's e-mail to believers@romans.gov
  • Reason Cain killed Abel: they were living in the one bedsit and the dishes weren't getting done.
  • The t...

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Where do you weigh a pie?

Posted by Anne Witton on Tuesday, December 9, 2014, In : Random stuff 
...Somewhere over the rainbow!

I love a good cracker joke and have been collecting up favourites to share with you. Enjoy!



Q. Why did no-one bid for Rudolph and Blitzen on eBay?
A. Because they were two deer.

Q. How do you know if Santa's been in your garden shed?
A. You've got three extra hoes.

Q. What's the most popular Christmas wine?
A. 'I don't like Brussels sprouts!'

Q. What operating system do Advent calendars use?
A. Windows 24

Q. What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A. Fsh!

Q. Why are horse-dra...

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